Monday, August 8, 2016

Dear Leavitt



Leavitt,

My precious first born.  Your world is about to be rocked.  I promise in great ways.  You are about to receive a gift far greater than anything we could ever really explain to you now.  God has a way of putting everyone we need in our lives.  You are about to meet a new person who will impact you daily.  Someone that will try your patience, help you in hard times, and will give you a sense of loyalty only a sibling could.  You're about to become a big brother.

I know there will be days you are frustrated he's here.  Mad that your favorite people now love someone else the way they love you.  It's ok.  I promise to love you through the hard days.  I know you will be so protective and loyal eventually.  The way you already snatch toys back for your baby cousin Saylor.  When you're at daycare and see the injustice you jump to her defense.  There was once a day you wouldn't even let Mommy talk to her.  You will be fantastic, and when you aren't I am going to try my hardest to have a little extra grace for you those days.  Mommy and Daddy will help you get there.

I know you sense some change coming.  Mommy has been getting bigger by the week and you're wondering why we keep calling my belly baby.  I have been asking you to do more for yourself, and won't carry you as often as you like.  You are confused by your old room no longer being yours, but you love your new digs.  I am a little confused myself.  I have no idea how I will love someone as much as you.  Not because I don't already love him, but because you're the one who taught me how to love.  Everything good your Dad and I have ever done together has been to make your life the best we could.  I am forever grateful to have been blessed to be your Mom, and all the ways you made us better.


I am so excited to meet this person God has picked just for our family.  The little one who will watch your every move, admiring you.  The truth is, I wanted this baby as much for you as I did us.  I wanted someone to be there for you in the hard times if ever Mommy and Daddy can't be.  When your Grandfather died this year I needed my siblings more than ever to make me feel whole, and normal again.  People who understood him, could laugh at the memories and cry for our loss. No one, not even a spouse or friend can sympathize like a sibling.  I want you to have that support system too.  A person who you can roll your eyes with behind our backs, and tell jokes about us only you two could ever understand.  A person to share your grief when life is hard, because life is hard sometimes.  You aren't just getting a brother.  You're getting an uncle for your little ones.  He might one day give you a niece or nephew, cousins for your kids one day.

I am excited for you to share your love of family, fishing, and the great outdoors with him.  You will have to show him around Dad's work, and tell him where all the good snacks are.  He's going to think you are the greatest person ever, believe me.  You see, Mommy is the baby of her family.  I fiercely love my siblings, and depend on them to be a listening ear when I feel judged by the world, or not good enough they lift me back up.  I hope you will always find that best friend in each other, that's what family is all about. 


All my Love,
Mommy



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