Summer Wanderlust

The weather around here has not been ideal.  In all honesty it has been sucky at best.  Yesterday I was in a rotten mood, I had no motivation and my little sidekick was feeling the same.  We sat around, I did a little crying (hormones and grief are a major bitch) but once the sun warmed up around lunch time I threw as much as I could in a bag and took off.  I honestly thought we were going to Bar Harbor but then decided to head to Fort Knox.  We got there around one in the afternoon, the breeze was warm and our mood was light.  

We toured the fort, he loved looking out all the windows and was terrified of the tunnels... me too kid,  me too.  We then picked up rocks and climbed the cannons over looking the river.  He held my hand the whole time leading me from one exciting thing to the next.  He kept saying "mom, look!" I love that he likes to share his excitement with me, and that he wants me to have fun too.  As we walked together he pointed out the lupines and wanted to pick them.  He hands me them one by one and encourages me to smell them.  Seriously.  Melt my heart.  

We then went over to the observation tower in the bridge.  He loved the elevator and looking out at all the "fish" which were actually fishing boats.  He hugged me in between running around in circles at the top of the tower and kept giving me kisses.  We basically had the whole place to ourselves which of course made enjoying the tower much more fun for us both.  

He napped the whole way home and when he woke up he was in the best mood still so we went to the farm for ice cream and a little chicken chasing.  We also got an X rated goat show which was quitting time for me.  Of course we weren't on the same page and he attempted to slap me while I was loading him in the car kicking and screaming.  I of course cried again while telling him he could not hit mommy... seriously hormones you can chill.  He told me it was "ok mama" and that he was in fact sorry.  

I live for days like today when everything isn't right with my soul and yet my heart can be full.  I am navigating pregnancy and grief the best way I can.  The hormones make the emotional roller coaster of losing a parent even less predictable.  Yet my heart is full, full of adventure and love.  I am so thankful I will have more days like today with him before he gets promoted to big brother.  I need to check out a few other places to day trip but we will definitely be heading back to Fort Knox... especially since it Cost $5 for the park and $3 for the ice cream... cheap date!